For When You Feel Like a Failure
- Jamal Hegwood
- May 19
- 3 min read
Let’s talk about something most people don’t post about: failure.
Not the cute kind where you messed up a meeting or forgot to hit “save” on a document. I’m talking about the kind that makes you question your worth. The kind that whispers, “Maybe you were never built for this.”
Maybe it’s the business that didn’t take off. The dream that hasn’t materialized.The job you can’t stand showing up to every day.The season that feels like everyone else is moving forward while you’re still trying to breathe.
And somewhere deep inside, a voice has been getting louder: “You’ve failed. And maybe…you are a failure.”
Let’s silence that lie today.
Failure Is an Event, Not Your Identity
“The steps of a good man are ordered by the Lord, and He delights in his way. Though he fall, he shall not be utterly cast down; for the Lord upholds him with His hand.” — Psalm 37:23–24
Notice the word though. Not if. Even when your steps are ordered, you may still fall. Even when you’re faithful, you may still face frustration. But the promise is this: you will not be utterly cast down.
Why? Because failure doesn’t get the final say—God does.
Let’s Rethink What Failure Is
Most people define failure as a result. But often, failure is just feedback. It’s a signal, not a sentence—a lesson, not a label.
You didn’t fail because your business didn’t go viral. You didn’t fail because your job doesn’t match your dream. You didn’t fail because your timing didn’t match your expectations.
Perhaps you’ve been measuring success by speed rather than sustainability. By applause instead of alignment.By results instead of resilience.
But God measures differently. He looks at the faith, the endurance, and the character being formed.
And guess what? Even Jesus had people walk away from Him. Even Paul faced rejection, shipwreck, prison, and unmet plans. Purpose doesn’t protect you from pain. But it does give your pain meaning.
If You’re Still Here, You’re Not Done
You might feel tired, disappointed, or stuck. But if you're still breathing, then God's still building.
Here are a few truths I need you to hold onto:
1. The job doesn’t define your value.
You may hate where you are, but that doesn’t mean you’ve missed your purpose. Sometimes, God uses uncomfortable places to reveal unshakable truths. Ask Him, “What are you teaching me here?”
2. The business wasn’t a waste.
It may not have gone how you planned, but it produced grit, wisdom, and lessons you couldn’t have gotten otherwise. Failure isn't the opposite of success—it’s often the path to it.
3. God’s timing includes your detours.
You’re not too late. You’re not disqualified. You’re not off-track. Heaven doesn’t operate on your calendar app.
4. You’re allowed to start again.
With more experience, more clarity, and more humility.The most powerful leaders you admire? They’ve been through more “failures” than you know. They just didn’t stop there.
What To Do Next
If you’re in that “I feel like I’ve failed” space, try this:
Pray raw, not pretty. Let God into your discouragement. Don’t perform. Just be honest.
Write down the wins you forgot. Look back and list the things you did overcome. Your memory can lie when your emotions are loud.
Ask a better question. Instead of “Why did I fail?”, ask “What am I learning?”
Talk to someone. Don't suffer in silence. Whether it’s a mentor, coach, or friend, let someone speak into your blind spots.
And finally...👉🏽 Take the next small step. Not the perfect one. Not the finished one. Just the next one.
Final Thought: You’re Not a Failure. You’re in Formation.
You’re not broken. You’re being rebuilt. You’re not disqualified. You’re being developed. You’re not behind. You’re being realigned.
And when the dust settles and the fog lifts, you’ll look back and say, "That moment didn’t end me—it equipped me."
God is not done writing your story. So please don’t stop reading it now.
If you’re in a place where you need clarity about your direction, purpose, or calling as a leader, I encourage you to check out the Effective Leadership Test (ELT). It’s more than a personality assessment. It’s a tool to help you rediscover how you lead best—and why your voice still matters.
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